In today’s connected society, porn is everywhere. Unfortunately, this abundant access to such explicit material means that porn addiction is rapidly becoming a serious issue for individuals and couples alike.
While watching porn may not seem as troublesome as infidelity, it can achieve the same result. Even though your spouse is not manifesting their sexual betrayal with physical contact, the effect can be similar to cheating, meaning that it can derail or destroy your relationship.
Although recovery is a viable option for most porn addicts, the first step is recognizing that there is a problem in the first place, which means that you will have to confront your spouse about his actions. However, before you can do that, you must be sure that you know what he’s up to.
So, with that in mind, we want to share six signs that your spouse may be cheating on you with porn.
#1 Change in Behavior
You know your husband better than anyone, which is why you can usually tell when he’s doing something he shouldn’t be. Thus, the first sign that something may be amiss is a noticeable change in his behavior.
While the exact details can vary, you should trust your instincts. While this may not be enough to confront him outright, it will give you a reason to start trying to find out more details about what’s going on beneath the surface.
#2 More Time Spent Online
Because porn is mostly accessed over the internet, the more time your spouse spends online, the more chances he has of coming across explicit material, even by accident. Thus, if he has started to spend more of his time browsing the internet, particularly on his own, then it could be a sign that his actions are not as pure as they should be.
Another critical point to consider when paying attention to your spouse’s internet habits is how he reacts when you approach him. For example, if he quickly shuts down pages or makes it seem like you’re bothering him, the chances are that he’s looking at something he’s not supposed to.
One excellent way to monitor his habits without making it seem like you’re snooping is to check his browser history. Although most men are aware of this minor detail, many of them will forget from time to time. Also, if his history is wiped clean, it could be a sign that he’s trying to hide something.
#3 Lackluster Sexual Performance
More than anything else, porn addiction can manifest itself with a lowered sex drive. As your spouse becomes more dependent on explicit images and videos to stimulate arousal, the real thing starts to become less and less effective.
This happens in two different ways. First, his attraction to you may wane noticeably the more he watches porn. If he’s not interested in being intimate with you as often as he was before, chances are that something else is monopolizing his attention.
Secondly, his libido will suffer from his addiction. In many cases, erectile dysfunction is a common side effect of watching porn, so the times that you do try to stimulate him in the bedroom, he may be unable to perform.
Overall, if you notice this happening with some prevalence or consistency, there’s a good chance that he’s suffering from porn addiction.
#4 He Focuses More on Your Appearance
Another side effect of porn addiction is that addicts will start to value physical appearance over personal connections. Depending on the severity of the problem, he may begin to nitpick your looks and demand that you make changes to look more sensual or attractive. While this isn’t necessarily a sign of porn addiction on its own, taken with other symptoms, it could be a detail that shows his problem is only getting worse.
#5 He’s Hiding Something
Once you begin getting suspicious of your spouse’s actions, then you may start to ask questions about his habits, particularly when it comes to online activity. If he deflects your queries or gets defensive, then he’s most likely hiding something and doesn’t want to admit the truth.
In many cases, he will only get more belligerent when you press the issue, which can create conflict between you. If this happens, then it’s probably time to start figuring out a way to confront him so that he can begin the first step toward recovery.
#6 He’s Emotionally Distant
Finally, porn addiction can overcome a person’s ability to connect intimately with their spouse, which includes emotions as well as physical capabilities. If he seems like he’s disinterested in what’s happening with you, or it feels like he’s pulling away, then it could be that his addiction is getting stronger and taking over more of his life.
Bottom Line
No matter what, you will notice your partner becoming a different person once he starts down the path toward addiction. Thus, it’s imperative that you can spot the signs and take action sooner rather than later.
The path toward recovery is going to be long and difficult for both of you, but the sooner you can start, the better off he will be. In many cases, spouses can feel ashamed of the actions of their loved ones, but the fact is that confronting him is a crucial first step towards recovery. If you do nothing, then the problem will only get worse.